In my first life, I learned to protect others. This was told to me. Silently by the stereotypes. Because it was told to me, that I am a male, so I played that role. And I swear, this is one of the very interesting and good properties of testosterone: It made me clear. It made me focused. It made me powerful.
And most people felt safe, accepted and protected in my shortness. I carry most of the doubts and obstacles of others. I was a fortress for many people in the times of anger, fear and lost. And I didn't forgot how to manage and give that capabilities to the world, after I starting the journey into my second life.
But I didn't learned how to protect myself. Because I only existed in times of bright light. I only existed in my first life as a shadow.
How to protect a shadow?
How to protect a being, which materialized from darkness?
How to protect myself, from all this aggressions, doubts, hate, self-harm and the cis-female ideals in my head?
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LG Thomas